What really happened to the dinosaurs!

I recently started a bible study with some friends and we are in the process of studying what the bible says about creation as compared to science.  My wife sent this to me today so that I now know for sure what happened!

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The first “senior moment.”

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What movie is this dialogue from?

First Person:  Вы говорите Россию?

Second Person:  Мало.  Я всегда считал, что хорошо, чтобы изучить пути своего противника.

First Person:  Yes, it is!

News Release – Obama Named Country Music Entertainer of the Year!

Obama Named Country Music Entertainer of the Year
Surprise Selection Shocks  Nashville
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NASHVILLE (The Borowitz Report) – President Barack Obama stunned the country music world today by picking up its highest honor, Country Music Entertainer of the Year.

Mr. Obama was chosen unanimously, according to the Country Music Association, beating out such favorite as Carrie Underwood and Toby Keith.

In  Nashville , country music insiders were shocked by Mr. Obama’s selection, given that he has only been in office for eight months and during that time has yet to record a single country song.

But Mr. Obama was gracious in receiving the honor, saying that he was "honored and humbled" by the award before excusing himself to accept this year’s Heisman Trophy.

A little something to brighten your day!

 

Hope you enjoy these.  I know I did.
 

Always try to help a friend in need

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Believe in yourself

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Study hard

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Give lots of kisses

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Laugh often

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Don’t be overly concerned with your weight, it’s just a number

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Always try to see the glass half full

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Meet new people, even if they look different to you

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Remain calm, even when it seems hopeless

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Take lots of naps..

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Be weird whenever you have the chance

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Love your friends, no matter who they are

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Don’t waste food

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RELAX

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Take an occasional risk

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Try to have a little fun each day.
…it’s important

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Share a joke with friends

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Fall in love with someone….

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…and say ‘I love you’ often

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Express yourself creatively

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Be conscious of your appearance

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Always be up for surprises

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Love someone with all of your heart

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Share with friends

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Watch your step

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It will get better

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There is always someone who loves you more than you know

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Exercise to keep fit

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Live up to your name

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Seize the Moment

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Hold on to good friends; they are few and far between

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Indulge in the things you truly love

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Cherish every Sunday

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At the end of the day… PRAY

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……… And close your eyes

And smile at least once a day!

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Out of the mouths of babes!

A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, ‘Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face.’

‘Yes,’ the class said.

‘Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn’t run into my feet?’

A little fellow shouted,

‘Cause your feet ain’t empty.’

 

Dennis “The Computer Guy” Wilson

http://TheComputerGuysLLC.com

Ok..so it has nothing to do with computers….I just liked it.